Found out yesterday that the only form of support that I have has now got cancer. My grandmother was yesterday diagnosed with cancer of the kidney. I think she will survive it but she is the only form of support that I have. Now i feel like I can't and shouldn't talk to her about anything because of the disease that she is going through. I had a fight with her as well earlier in the week. I brung up the topic of having an emergency family meeting about my sister's dangerously increasing weight and the minute I brought it up Mum is a reformed alcoholic but is now anorexic and an exercise addict and there are a concoction of problems with my sister, her dad, his boyfriend, my dad and his wife. I feel really really snowed under. My luck just never ever seems to get better and the minute something good happens and it all seems to be on the bright side it is quickly ruined by something even harder. I'm bored of feeling the emotional pain. I think the physical pain is a lot easier to deal with. I'm not going to kill myself but I just don't want to feel like this anymore.
